New Challenge

When I was in my teen’s my favorite show was Gilmore Girls.  I have many a fond memory of my mother and I curled up on the couch watching the show.  I often dreamed of being like Rory.  She was smart, funny, and very much her own person.  While surfing around the internet one day I came across a list of books from my favorite tv show.  The list had every book ever mentioned on the show.  Now, of course a few of them aren’t real but the vast majority are.  So I have decided to embark on a new challenge…to read the entire list if plausible.  I copied the list and printed it out.  Then I went over it to see if I could already check off some books.  About ten down only 380 some more to go!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Here’s the link in case you too want to embark on a literary journey.  Good luck my friends! Rory Gilmore’s Reading List

Where’s My Magic Carpet?

For as long as I can remember, there has been this thirst in me to see the world and all its wonders.  I’m not just talking about the ancient structures or the typical tourist things (not that there’s anything wrong with them) but the colorful tapestry that is mankind.  I love experiencing different cultures and learning how they see the world and their place in the universe.  And honestly, I think that’s where we are failing.  I see it on the news and hear it in passing conversations.  There’s too much talk about “them” and not enough about “us”.  No matter where or how you grew up our drives are all the same.  We want a good like for our family and our people.  Ok time for me to get off my soap box.

The main reason why I wanted to post today was because the travel bug has attacked me with a vengeance.  Just recently, my husband’s babushka came to visit all the way from Uzbekistan.  Now for those of you who do not know, Uzbek used to be part of Soviet Russia, so his grandma considers herself Russian.

Any who.

I felt bad not being able to talk to her because I don’t speak Russian and she doesn’t speak English.  Thank goodness for Google Translate.  It may not be 100% correct, but we were able to carry on a small conversation.  By the end of the visit my husband once again broached the subject of getting our passports.  We always talk about getting them but never do anything further (a bad habit of ours) but now, I think, we might finally do it.  There are too many places that I want to see in this world.  Too many things that I want to do and too many new flavors I want to savor.  It’s time and past for me to get a passport, pack my bags, and live like the gypsy that I was always meant to be.

Here’s where I want to go:

Drink a pint in Ireland.

Ride a horse through the Scottish highlands

Marvel at the ruins of Ancient Rome

Sail along the Mediterranean Sea

Be in the Red Square while it snows

Visiting the temples in China

See Mt Everest (I’m not crazy enough to climb it)

Walk where the Pharaohs once walked

Dine on top of the Eiffel Tower

See Stonehenge

That’s not everything but just a small list of the places I want to go to some day.

Until next time my people!

Comparing

I know I am very much guilty of this.  I highly doubt that there is a single person in this world who doesn’t compare themselves to other people.  Sibling rivalry ring a bell?  And honestly I don’t really think it’s all that bad, but I do have to agree that the best person to compare yourself against is you.  We know what we had to overcome to reach where we are.  We simply don’t know that about other people.  They may have gone through hell and back and are now finally on the up swing.

I know that I have made plenty of mistakes and had my fair share of failures, but I’ve gotten over them and am all the better for it.  I’ve come a long way on my path to be a better author, better wife, better person and I know that I’m not done yet.  I’m hella proud of the achievements that I have made.

So stop worrying about what the people around you have.  Instead focus on how you can become a better version of yourself.

 

Love ya!

 

A collection of moments

In the spirit of this pretty little picture and quote I want to talk about my recent trip up to Hanging Rock.  The plan was to go camping for a couple of days and unplug, but that didn’t pan out, so we just went hiking instead.  My husband and I invited my parents (who we were staying with) to come along and they said yes.

We decided to do the water fall trails because they were a little easier and my step father is still recovering from knee surgery.

The trail was nice and I enjoyed being out in the woods.  We reached one of the over hangings and I went up to the edge and sat down on the edge.  I was more than content to just sit there a few moments and relish the coolness of the stone benieth me, coupled with the warmth of the sun and the scent of wet earth.  But my folks wanted to take a couple of pictures and move on.  Oh well, to each their own I suppose.  When we reached the bottom where the water fall was I handed my stuff off to my hubby and climbed down to it.  My mom wanted to know what I was doing and I told her that standing under a waterfall was on my bucket list.  Now, mind you, I pictured it in some tropical location but hey, I’ll take what I can get.  My hubby soon joined me and together we stood under the chilly water.

The point of the story is this:  Live in the moment.  Take time to make memories and get the pictures on the way out.

 

Until next time my friends

Progress

My husband and I are having some fertility issues.  I went to see a specialist, and like any time you go see the doctor, they made me get on the scale.  It was a bit of a shock seeing the number I saw.  So when I got home, I swore to change.  I’ve made some adjustments and am trying to get into the swing of working out and what not.  I have to constantly remind myself that any progress I make is good.  So that brings us to the quote of the week:

 

Pull the Pieces Back Together

I had a melt down a couple of days ago.  It was pretty bad.  You see, I suffer from bouts of depression and anxiety.  They come and go with irregular frequency.  The depression doesn’t last for very long, and I have good coping mechanisms so I don’t take medication.  However, my anxieties are growing.  The reason why I’m opening up like this is because I feel like I need too.  So many people, and myself, have a hard time opening up about the darkness in our heads.  I guess there’s a sense of shame because why can’t we be happy like everyone else.  This sorta leads me up to my melt down.

I have never really been a healthy person.  The only time I was was while I served in the military and even then, it wasn’t 100% healthy.  I have some medical issues that have caused me to put on an unhealthy amount of weight and quitting smoking has also caused me to put on some pounds.  My mental issues are exasperated by my weight issues and my weight issues are exasperated by my mental issues.  See my problem here?

My only saving grace is my husband.  Honestly, I don’t think I could have pulled myself out of the black whole of self-doubt if it wasn’t for him.  He has seen me at my best and at my worst.  We are trying to have a baby but have run into complications.  Fertility medication hasn’t worked and now the doctors are going to see if all my parts are working right.  I, however, believe that my weight is a major issue, so I have begun steps to remedy that.

I’m hoping that as I fix my body physically, my mind and perhaps my soul, will also pull themselves back together.  It is an awful feeling, hating everything about yourself.  I struggle to find one thing that I like about myself everyday.  Sometimes it’s a physical thing, sometimes it’s something much deeper.  I know talking about my troubles helps tremendously but more often than not, I choose to suffer in silence because I hate to be a burden on anyone.  My husband tells me that I’m not, so I’ll have to take his word for it.

For any of you who are also suffering (civilian or veteran) please find someone that you feel like you can talk to without fear.  Hell, message me and I’ll be your shoulder.

Until next time, my peoples!

Much love